Letters to the Real Life

by Sara Parsons

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04:51
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03:04
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released November 25, 2013

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Sara Parsons San Jose, California

I'm officially a 20-something. I make music on and off, trying to get more on than off, but life happens.

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Track Name: Untitled (A Song of Maybes)
Maybe I'm too deep this time
Maybe I can't find a rhyme for reason
Maybe there's a point in time
Somewhere further down the line
A new season

When every moment
Feels like home
And every word that's spoken
Sounds just like a song
Well maybe the nights I've spent out walking
Will finally get me talking
Or maybe I'm just wrong

Maybe I am out of touch
Last year was a bit too much to handle
Friends keep saying I'm alright
But their logic's not air-tight, can't hold a candle

But every single chance to be alone
Had my heart hoping it would be the one
Well maybe the nights I've spent out walking
Will finally get me talking
Or maybe I'm just wrong

Maybe there's too much to me
Read my book, you'd never reach this chapter
Put me in another place
Where nobody knows my face or what I'm after

Then every one of my mistakes
Would be the last one I'd ever make
Well maybe tonight I'll make my mind up
And pitch right through my wind-up
Or maybe I'm just wrong
Track Name: Come Again Soon
I said you weren't the first in line
You assured me that was fine.
You keep your worries wrapped in twine
Hope I won't see into your mind.
Now you're taking pictures of my hands
Dragging lines into the sand
That tell the story of a man
And the ruins of his best laid plans

He came and saw and conquered, but
Who was I to offer him a rose?

It can't be helped, it can't be opened,
It's already broken, locked in a room
The key's long gone, no use hopin'
But here is your token, it says "come again soon."

He might appear a little meek,
But then I've always been a freak.
And when he kissed my frozen cheek,
Every inch of me went weak.
Had he been a king, well, I'd have let him rule
Let him use me like a tool
Maybe you think that's a little cruel,
But I'd still play the part of the fool

For you to stand there staring, means
My delusion's glaring like lightning
It can't be helped, it can't be opened,
It's already broken, locked in a room
The key's long gone, no use hopin'
But here is your token, it says "come again soon."

You say he didn't treat me right,
You say I shouldn't have to fight,
But wish you may, and honey, wish you might,
I won't be coming home tonight.

It can't be helped, it can't be opened,
It's already broken, locked in a room
The key's long gone, no use hopin'
But here is your token, it says "come again soon."

It can't be helped, it can't be opened,
It's already broken, locked in a room
The key's still his, my cheek's still frozen
The highway is open, I'll be seeing him soon.
Track Name: Mix CD
I popped in the old mix CD
You made when you were still in love with me
It takes me to another time
Where what we could have had was nearly mine
My hair was long, I let it down
I'd only tie it when you weren't around.
Spent every evening by your side,
Pretended you pretended not to mind.

Sorry I'm not bold,
Sorry I'm not strong,
Sorry that I moved along.

I'd love to be your remedy
If you feel down, come running straight to me.
Rebuild each other from the start,
I'd let you raid the wreckage of my heart.
I'd gladly be a hypocrite,
And let my reputation take a hit.
I should have made a move back then
But now each day, it's "I remember when."

Sorry, you were right,
Sorry, I was wrong,
Sorry that I moved along.

Hope that it's all in my head,
But I can never tell.
I'd ask, but I've convinced myself
That silence works just as well.

Don't really know what went so wrong,
But sure as hell, what once was there is gone.
The mix CD's been played to death
But I still sing the songs under my breath

Sorry I messed up,
Sorry I skipped town,
Sorry I can't say
Why I couldn't hang around
Sorry if I wait
A little bit too long.
Sorry that I wrote this song.
Track Name: Forever
I climbed
To the top of that tree
Til the leaves were so thick, that all I could see
Was my life line
Pulse beating so loud
So loud that I had to climb down

I crawled
Up the rocks through the sand
To the brink of the cliffs where the ocean meets land
And my hands bled
Salt stinging the wounds
And I knew it had happened too soon.

And I'm asking myself the same questions
I've asked other people before
And we're still watching films from the 50s
But I swear it was just 2004

Forever will still be around
Long after we're done
Long after you're dead and gone
Forever will still roll along
Time's running out, but still running on.

He said
It would happen to me
It would come all too quick, and soon I would be
In a mindfuck
In a state of disgrace
Caught trying to come in last place

She said
Take a breath, slow it down
Spend afternoons crafting your daisy-chain crowns
Take your time, love,
Life's waiting for you
Though I never found that to be true

And I'm asking myself the same questions
I've asked other people before,
As the plum blossoms snow on the back lawn
I'm daydreaming thoughts of "forever more"

Forever will still be around
Long after we're done
Long after you're dead and gone
Forever will still roll along
Time's running out, but still running on.

And I'm asking myself the same questions
I've asked other people before
When the hell did this life get so twisted?
What can I do to settle the score?

I thought
We could idle a bit
We could break all the dishes and talk lots of shit
But the truth is
That we've all got it wrong
That there's no way to know just how long.
Track Name: Lady
Born at the age of 3
Never got a chance to be
Anything but a lady
Don't you dare call her "baby"

Favorite drink's her cherry coke
Likes it when the bubbles tickle
All up in her nose
She won't drink it at the table
Won't drink it at the shows
But Lady says she loves it
And what Lady says just goes

Lady ain't no baby and she knows just what this is
Hours on the balcony just staring down at his
Lady's planning moves out from the playbook in her mind
Lady's doing great, yeah I hear
Lady's doing fine

Picked up her last paycheck
Rent was three months late
Lady bought a crowbar and just
Let herself in through the gate

She fed the landlord's pitbull
And locked him in his crate
Then Lady kept on walking
And that's what sealed her fate

Lady ain't no baby and she knows just where this leads
Hiking up her too-short skirt and puking in the weeds
Lady's going crazy but the doctor says she's fine
Lady's in some trouble now, yeah
Lady's doing time

Years have gone by crawling
Lady's on the mend
Husband after husband
But not a single friend
Lady says she's happy
She'll say so 'til the end

Lady ain't no baby and she's heard it all before
"You need this" and "You should that." Can't take it anymore
Lady's missed appointments and she's falling far behind
Lady won't pick up the phone and
Lady's on my mind
Lady's on my mind
Lady's on my mind
Track Name: Guilt
I won't lie, no, I haven't been by
It's a fantasy of mine
To unlatch your gate on a bright Spring day
and stroll up and down the lines

I've waited a while, a while too long
To make that connection
Acting like I don't see the seasons pass
Or the spread of this infection

They tell me it was meant to happen that way
But I won't listen to a word they say

Where does the comfort come from
When I know time's not on our side,
and I can't with good conscience say I tried?

When I think of you, I always think about how
God, it might be nice
If the last words that you ever said to me
Weren't "Thanks for the advice."

It was meant to happen
That's what they all say
I never wanted to turn out this way

Where does the comfort come from
When I know time's not on our side,
and I can't with good conscience say I tried?

If I could talk to ghosts,
I'd never leave you be.
You're the only spirit
I would ever choose to see
And every single hour
I wonder where you are
I hope that you are comfortable
I hope you can see stars

If it was meant to happen
If that's what they say
How much longer will I feel this way?

Where does the comfort come from
When I know time's not on our side,
and I can't with good conscience say I tried?
No, I can't with good conscience say I tried.
Track Name: Who Am I Kidding?
I'm resolute, I'm absolute
But that doesn't matter when it comes to you
Change your mind, I'm a waste of time
But you could never waste mine

You're in every scar, you're in every bruise,
You're gone when I win but you're there when I lose
The sun in my sky and the breath when I sigh,
"It'll be better this time."

Who am I?
Who am I kidding?
Caught your eye, didn't I?
Who am I kidding?

You soften your touch just a little too much
And soon I know nothing about you
Circle around, got my feet on the ground
But I don't know this world without you

Who was I?
Who was I kidding?
Caught your eye, didn't I?
Who was I kidding?

How easy it was to turn my whole life on its end
I thought that I knew I could count on you as a friend
How could I let my fate fall into someone else's hands?
Are you a man
or a child just playing pretend?

Bring back the hurt, bring back the pain,
I take back the words that sent you away
I'll let you lead me through Hell by the reins
And you'll never know that it stings